Recently, while I was driving, my radio was tuned by propitious coincidence to an interview with Dr. David J. Linden, a neuroscientist and the author of Unique: The New Science of Human Individuality (New York: Basic Books, 2020). Since I frequently reference individuality in my writing, I was deeply interested in listening to his perspectives and findings. Subsequently, I bought his book and decided to share some of his most salient ideas, such as the following passage from the epilogue: […]

The subject of this blog post is a bit off topic because it has little to do with twins, per se. However, a recent session with a twin patient evoked thoughts that I feel are important to share. I am an avid proponent of psychotherapy, as you might presume. My own treatment shaped me in ways otherwise unimaginable. As a result, I avidly encouraged all five of my adult children to recognize its value and to seek help from an […]

Competition is an expectable dynamic within most sibling relationships. This issue can be particularly troublesome for twin pairs because they are constantly compared and defined by their differing skills or personality traits. In my work with adult twins who have intense competitive feelings, I have learned how unresolved envy can cause havoc as siblings mature. The case of an identical twin woman in her sixties, whom I will call Terry, illustrates how her connection to her sister is undermined by […]

Siblings of twins often do not get the psychological attention they deserve. My readers frequently ask me to write a book dedicated to this topic! I’d like to share some thoughts about a young woman in her late twenties whom I will call Veronica. Veronica’s mom, Mrs. T., contacted me eight years ago about her identical twin daughters when they began displaying bouts of anger with each other that she had never witnessed before. We spoke on the telephone a […]

If we don’t think alike, we’re not twins; if we’re not twins, who are we? I only know myself and you through the twinship lens. How can I tolerate a perspective that no longer matches what I believe to be true? I need you to think like me, otherwise we’re not connected. If you don’t think like me, you cannot value, appreciate, or love me. How can we stay connected if we do not see eye to eye? If not, […]