It stands to reason that many of us who enter the helping professions have a fundamental proclivity for being helpful, and we enjoy feeling needed and appreciated. In the case of psychotherapists, our professional training, our ongoing personal therapy, and our continuing education enable us to secure and maintain healthy boundaries with our patients. While we experience tremendous gratification and a sense of well-being when our clients are doing well, we are careful not to consciously or unconsciously demand that […]
Blog
Isolation, Separation, Growth
I am so grateful that I could remain engaged with patients who have grown and changed considerably during this period of confinement. These individuals live either alone or with their significant other. The physical and emotional separation resulting from self-isolation has led to positive disruptions in their habitual, taken-for-granted interactions with loved ones. I want to share the story of one client whom I shall call Cherise. She is a woman in her midsixties and the mother of two young-adult […]
Sizing Up the Competition
Competition among siblings is integral to most families. Our natural instinct is to survive and thrive. Many twin pairs, however, have a different experience with sibling rivalry and competitiveness because of their intimate relationship. While twins fight just as much—or possibly more—than nontwin siblings, their feelings about surpassing or outdoing their twin can be conflicting and confusing. More often than not, identical twins that compete in the same sport are wholly supportive of and noncompetitive with their sibling. Often they […]
The Luxury of Alone Time
Most of us are currently searching for positive aspects of social isolation. If one or both parents are working from home, they may have unexpected opportunities to spend individual time with each twin. Of course, each household has different needs. Nonetheless, let’s brainstorm some creative possibilities that might suit your family: Organize separate times to read/dance/cook/draw with each twin. Bathe the twins separately. Change up the bedtime routine by having each parent handle one twin. Plan separate walks with each […]
What Is Your Silver Lining?
I want to share my thoughts in this blog post about the new normal imposed on us by the coronavirus. Through conversations with my patients, I have come to appreciate how prior experience in managing emotional and physical vulnerabilities equipped some individuals to adapt better to self-isolation. For example, a young woman who battled an aggressive cancer shared that she has already experienced the conditions the rest of us are grappling with. She faced an unpredictable disease; she lived through […]