Twins often find it difficult to appreciate their own successes. Since so many of their accomplishments are evaluated in relation to their twin, many twins find it challenging to absorb a singular success. It has been a habitual practice to evaluate a twin’s status by comparing what one twin has or doesn’t have–or did or did not do–with that of the other twin. Singletons are accustomed to being compared with others, and consequently they learn how to integrate their successes […]
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Fertility Drugs, not IVF, Are Top Cause of Multiple Births
When I spoke in New Zealand, I learned that the country’s national health service pays for two rounds of in vitro fertilization (IVF), each time implanting a single embryo. A recent report by Nancy Shute for NPR reveals some fascinating findings. She writes that a study published in the New England Journal of Medicine relates that drugs such as Clomid and injectable hormones account for the largest percentage of triplets and higher-order multiples in the United States. Fertility drugs are cheaper and […]
Twins and Altruism
Recently, I commented about a pair of 21-year-old identical twin female tennis players qualifying for the first time at Wimbledon. Sadly, the twin who advanced to the next round could not fully celebrate the biggest win of her career because her twin sister had lost her match. If you are not a twin, you may find it hard to understand why the victorious twin had to downplay and deflect her success. Let me share Jeffrey Kluger’s definition of altruism from […]
The Aha Moment
When I go to social events and talk about my professional obsession with twins, an aha moment inevitably accompanies my explanation about my work and research: “Wow, I never thought about that. That is so interesting.” It seems that most people know a twin, know someone who has twins, or went to school with a twin. For me, the moment is gratifying and surprising at the same time. It is validating because it underscores the ongoing societal perception of idealized […]
Transitions
One mom at the New Zealand Multiple Birth Association conference shared how she has come to understand the importance of transitions when it comes to parenting. Her teenage twin boys have developed into very distinct persons. She is now cognizant about how each one might use the twinship—often as a crutch or as leverage to get what the other one has. These boys are in separate classes and have some separate relationships with other friends. This mom astutely sees that […]