I received an e-mail from a college-age female twin whom I will call Molly. Molly reached out to me because she was feeling worried and frustrated about her relationship with her sister Maddy. Although Molly and Maddy were now in their second year of attending separate colleges, Molly felt ongoing concerns about their twin relationship. Molly and Maddy are the eldest children, with three younger siblings. Molly described that she and her sister were basically treated as a unit most […]
Category Archives: Caretaking
Twins: Addicted to Opioids and Each Other
I recently did a consultation about a pair of twins who became addicted to opioids after one of the teenage girls sustained a knee injury during a gymnastics competition. The girls are fourteen years old and have been devoted to training and performing since they were five years old. Both were highly gifted, motivated, and driven to excel. They spent practically every waking moment together training, practicing, and competing and had very little time for other activities or relationships. Gymnastics […]
The Psychology of Twins—Who Knew?
I have just returned from a glorious two-week stay in Argentina. I will need to “detox” from all the delicious meat and fabuous red wine that I happily consumed during my time there. I gave a presentation to a wonderfully warm and engaging group of parents of multiples who appreciated hearing my particular views and philosophy about raising twins. Prior to my trip, I encountered incredulous responses to my telling people that I had been invited to give a presentation about […]
The Vicissitudes of Twin Loss
In the last few months, I have been working with two grieving families. In both instances, a fraternal twin died owing to accidental circumstances—a drug overdose and an automobile collision. The man was in his late thirties and the young woman in her late twenties. While my heart goes out to those who have lost a loved one, I am inclined to be most concerned about the surviving twins and their well-being. In both cases, the surviving twin was the […]
Constantly in Search of Acceptance
It stands to reason that many of us who enter the helping professions have a fundamental proclivity for being helpful, and we enjoy feeling needed and appreciated. In the case of psychotherapists, our professional training, our ongoing personal therapy, and our continuing education enable us to secure and maintain healthy boundaries with our patients. While we experience tremendous gratification and a sense of well-being when our clients are doing well, we are careful not to consciously or unconsciously demand that […]