Recently, Dr. Phil featured a program about sixteen-year-old twins, Taylor and Tricia, who both have an eating disorder. It was tragic to witness how these girls’ lives have been swallowed up in an anorexic bulimic vortex. The visual images of their binging and purging behavior were graphically stunning. While we certainly cannot know all of the circumstances that contributed to the girls’ eating disorder, the producers of this program focused on the parents’ divorce, the mother’s boyfriend, and the father’s […]
Category Archives: Competition
The Risks of Twin Motivation
While twins can be excellent motivators for each other, sometimes risks are associated with the constant comparison and competition that underlie their attachment. This article discusses how these dynamics can contribute to eating disorders in some identical twin pairs. It was originally published on FoxNews.com on August 28, 2016, and I am sharing it here with the author’s permission. Twins at higher risk for eating disorders, experts say Julie Revelant Growing up, identical twins Jennifer* and Marie*, 34, were best […]
Who’s Calling Whom Selfish?
When a twin who has seen a therapist in the past contacts me, he often tells me that his previous therapist shamed him by proclaiming that feeling abandoned, jealous, or guilty about his twin getting married, moving away, or having a better job is nothing short of selfish. This therapeutic lack of insight, empathy, and understanding about a twin’s state of mind in these predicaments drives me crazy. I imagine that if a singleton sibling were in treatment and these […]
Bermuda’s Amazing Multiples
My husband and I had been planning a trip to Bermuda for quite a while because some dear friends asked us to join them at the conclusion of their business meetings. On a whim I decided to look for a multiples group. To my surprise and delight I found the Amazing Multiples, a group affiliated with the Meet-a-Mum Association (MAMA). Both groups did a fantastic job coordinating the details of my presentation. Since the talk was held in one of the […]
Adult Twins: Identity, Rivalry, and Intimacy
Some twin pairs, not all, become disillusioned about their twinship because they struggle to be “known,” not just “noticed.” Since outsiders habitually relate to them as a unit or a fixed dyad, they expectedly have conflicts with their twin in an attempt to define or declare their individual selves. While twins fight just like different-aged siblings, their tensions have much more to do with establishing separateness and uniqueness, traits afforded naturally to siblings born at different times. Twins, especially identical […]