Suppose you are preparing to marry your soul mate, only to belatedly realize that this person is not truly yours alone? That may be because your mate’s soul is already intricately intertwined with others: a twin, triplets, perhaps a group of quadruplets. This quote is the opening paragraph of a New York Times article that appeared in the titled Wed Once, but Seeing Triple: Marrying a Twin (and Her Sister) by Alyson Krueger. Krueger writes about the sadness and confusion […]
Category Archives: Marriage
A Double Wedding, Of Course!
I was intrigued by an interview on www.huffingtonpost.com, conducted on April 4, 2014, entitled “How Identical Twins in College Handle Dating.” Identical twin girls in their sophomore year at the University of Texas in Austin talked about how much they enjoy dressing the same, completing each other’s sentences, and studying the same major so that they can go into business together after graduation. A statement made by one of the young women particularly struck me. When asked why they continue […]
Soul Mates or Cell Mates?
Healthy adult twins do not feel imprisoned by their twinship. They have acknowledged each other’s right to be separate and unique while maintaining their special connection. They have worked through feelings of ambivalence, competition, and jealousy, and each has evolved into an individuated self. Healthy twins care deeply about one another and recognize and respect each other’s autonomy and choices. They enjoy being together but do not require exclusive possession of one other in order to cope with life or […]
Boys Will Be Boys
By mere coincidence, I struck up a conversation with a lovely gentleman in his early 60s who happens to be an identical twin. Of course, I was curious to learn about his experiences, and he graciously shared his twin story with me. The gentleman explained that he and his brother were the eldest of five children. He marveled at his mother’s ability to take care of five children under the age of five all by herself. The children were raised […]
All You Need Is Love
The issue I have been asked to address coincidentally corresponds to a recent news story that has engendered passionate feelings and opinions. Married gay partners who fathered boy/girl twins with a surrogate split up and moved with their biological offspring to opposite coasts. The couple’s selfish intent to rob the twins of their connection seems unfathomable. Our reader’s inquiry also involves a divorce. However, contrary to these men’s selfish motives, this mother is deeply concerned about doing what is in […]