Do you recall the childhood experience of growing a bean seed inside a plastic cup stuffed with moist cotton? I was recently reminded of this when a mom of identical five-year-old twin daughters shared her story. She described how her girls rushed into the kitchen, each carrying her respective bean seed container. One of them was upset that her bean showed no growth while her sister’s seed was sprouting a healthy green root. The mom patiently explained that some plants […]
Tag Archives: siblings
Twin Parents’ Fatigue: Relentless Twin Bickering
Twins fight constantly. The interminable squabbling is a drag and a drain. In some ways, this power struggle is another aspect of the twin connection. This dynamic is often encountered in couples whose quarreling becomes the primary way they feel connected. If possible, it’s best to address the issue of fighting between twins sooner rather than later. As much as twins are each other’s biggest rival, they are also one another’s staunchest supporter. How can parents minimize tension and competition? […]
College Caretaking Casualties
Though the majority of calls that I receive are requests for advice, I had the pleasure of speaking with a female college-age twin about her journey of separating from her sister. I was delighted to hear how she and her sister have been approaching this subject honestly and mutually. Both women realize that their familiarity with one another has limited their ability and motivation to socialize with others. They recognize that they need to do more on their own and […]
Long Time No See
Often I post stories about twins celebrating milestone birthdays together. However, I rarely tell stories about adult twins who have reconnected in later life after some years of discord. An identical twin woman in her midseventies—whom I will call Mary—came to see me after a particularly traumatic interaction with her twin sister, Monica. These women live near one another—about a thirty-minute drive. They had a long history of getting together for family events but rarely saw one another by themselves. […]
Exploring the Relationships between Twins and Other Siblings
With the author’s permission, I am sharing a paper she wrote this summer. Gwendolen Huo is a sixteen-year-old identical twin who has an interest in exploring her relationship to her twin and their older sister. I trust you will appreciate her burgeoning efforts to articulate her emotional perspectives. Two Is Better than One, Right? Two pairs of feet, each with crimson red flats, marched forward together in unison. Further up, the two are wearing identical scarlet dresses rimmed with […]